The COMICS ALLIANCE Reviews: Rude, Kirby, McKeever, Ditko, and Eisner

COMICS ALLIANCE was one of my favorite comics-related sites, which is why I asked editor-extraordinaire Andy Khouri if they'd be interested in having me come on board to write some things for them near the end of last year. It all worked out perfectly -- they did want me to review in-print graphic novels or collected editions for them -- and I started off with a review/retrospective on the glory of Steve Rude and the first year or two of Nexus. That post went live in early 2013.

I came up with a list of other books they might like me to review -- including things like The Creeper, and Grimjack, and The End League, and Eddy Current, and Nextwave -- and Andy highlighted the ones the CA readership (or the CA editors, or both) might care about the most, so I started working, expecting to build up a stack of reviews that could run on COMICS ALLIANCE throughout 2013, maybe sliding into a weekly routine once I figured out how to work this extra writing gig into my normal routine. That never happened. I wrote a handful of retrospectives/reviews for CA and then, as you all probably know, COMICS ALLIANCE was shut down by its parent company without warning. I thought the site was just settling in to its witty balance of pop culture coverage and comic book analysis and had a long, ever-growing future ahead of it. That's why I was so happy to join the crew. But nope. It's all over.

I'm more saddened by not ever being able to read new material on the site, and the fact that a strong stable of writers and editors will have to scramble to find other paying work, than I am about losing the occasional paycheck for writing the kinds of reviews I had planned for CA. That was only ever going to cover the cost of the reviewed book and give me a little bit of spending money. I wasn't going to lose any money on the gig, but I wasn't going to make more than about $20 or $30 every week or two. It was just goofing-around-and-buying-a-few-comics-money. Nothing serious, but certainly helpful.

But, man, I miss the opportunity to be part of the COMICS ALLIANCE team and I'm sorry to see the site just stop dead.

I'll still be continuing my weekly "When Words Collide" column for Comic Book Resources, and though both my Great Alan Moore Reread and my Sandman Reread have come to an end at Tor.com, I have some other things in the works with the folks over there. But CA is no more.

For the record, here are my collected edition reviews that were published during my short few months at COMICS ALLIANCE:

Mike Baron and Steve Rude's 'Nexus': Exploding Preconceptions Since 1981

Jack Kirby's Spirit World: We Are on the Outside

The Inhuman Magnetism of Ted McKeever's 'Eddy Current'

Mania and Dream Logic: Looking Back at Ditko's Cackling 'Creeper'

The Anatomy of Expression: Will Eisner and 'A Contract with God'

I'm pleased with all five of these entries, and I hope you enjoy them while you can. No one knows how long the CA site archives will remain available, and AOL owns the content I've linked to above, so it's unlikely that I'll be able to ever republish the pieces I've written for them.

Yeah. Comics. They'll break your heart.

RAINBOW DASH Writer Ryan K. Lindsay Interviewed by Two MY LITTLE PONY Fans

In March of 2013, longtime CBR colleague and The Devil is in the Details editor and internet friend Ryan K. Lindsay will unleash a single issue of a comic book series that is destined to change the world. It's issue #2 of the My Little Pony "micro-series" featuring Rainbow Dash.

In the issue, the high-flying pony faces an insurmountable challenge: cloud goblins that threaten the skies!

I know what you're thinking: is this going to be the next Watchmen or is it going to be the next Dark Knight Returns or the next Mr. T and the T-Force or some divine combination of all three?

We'll have to wait until March to find out, but, until then, I have brought in a couple of junior members of the Geniusboy Firemelon editorial team to grill Mr. Lindsay on his intentions and his abilities. They're here to determine whether or not the young writer is cut out for the scrutiny of high-profile My Little Pony scholarship.

Here they are -- two short interviews that may make or break Ryan K. Lindsay's career:

INTERVIEW #1 BY LAUREN, AGE 8:

Lauren: Why did to choose to write about Rainbow Dash?

RKL: I actually pitched for a few of the ponies and my Rainbow Dash story was the one my editor, Bobby Curnow, liked the most. I chose her for one of my pitches mostly because she gets to do cool stuff with weather and the skies. That's an exciting skill set I thought would make for a cool story.

Lauren: What kind of story will this be? Is it adventure or comedy or is it scary?

RKL: It's mostly more in the action/adventure camp but there's one kind of jarring scene that's a PG level scare of sorts and I'm also hoping some of my jokes in there land. I don't know if writers are ever confident about their jokes in a script, I'm not.

Lauren: Will you be retelling an episode in your own way or telling an original story? Why?

RKL: I'm telling an original story. Anything else feels like plagiarism. Well, it could be adaptation but that doesn't sound as dramatic. I'm telling my original story because that's what my editor wants but fortuitously that's also what I am most interested in, I wanted to bring some new things to Equestria.

Lauren: Will your story take place in the past, present, or future?

RKL: Floating present.

Lauren: Which minor characters will appear in your story?

RKL: Applejack is the supporting character pony and Tank also gets to play a pivotal role. I've also created my own pony which I called, in the script only, Redford Pony. I think he's pretty rad.

Lauren: Which My Little Pony episode is your favorite? (My favorite is the one where Rarity makes outfits for all her friends.)

RKL: I'd have to go with 'Sonic Rainboom' but 'Read It and Weep' is definitely a close second. Rainbow is now my favorite pony so I like seeing her take center stage. She's an interesting character.

INTERVIEW #2 BY ANDREW, AGE 12:

Andrew: How do you suppose you will make Rainbow Dash 20% cooler?

RKL: There is one thing I do in this issue that I guarantee makes Rainbow Dash 20% cooler, at least. It was actually the first thing that came to me and became the crux of this entire issue. I build to this moment and I'm certain it pays off. I obviously can't spoil it but I will stake my reputation on it.

Andrew: What will you do to capture Rainbow Dash’s pure awesomeness?

RKL: You don't capture her awesomeness - I only hope to refract it through the fine crystals I use to divine my stories in the hopes of setting shards free to enter your brain stem.

Andrew: If you WERE planning to set the story in the future, I recommend renaming Rainbow Dash “Deathbow Dash” and giving her a trail of nuclear waste. Have you considered that?

RKL: I actually have (this now serving as a legal record that I had the idea and thus when I use it I will owe you no compensation). Although my Deathbow Dash leaves a trail of smog across the sky.

Andrew: Are you sure you don’t want to make the story about post-apocalyptic rainbow ponies after the great cupcake war of the year 5000 AE?

RKL: I'm actually more interested in capturing the turmoil surrounding the aftermath of the Apple Famine of 4650. That was when Applejack had to travel to the stars to locate Celestial Johnny Appleseed and get him to bless her crop with his mighty seed. It's a cracker of a tale but if we get a green light for a sequel I'll talk with you about the Great Cupcake War of 5000AE. So long as we dedicate an issue to the Batter Battle of Lemony Knoll.

Andrew: Well, what about turning all the ponies into mutant cyborgs then?

RKL: I'm the guy who pitched a pony story involving a Kung Fu Tournament, don't think I won't straight up steal your ideas.

WHAT DO YOU THINK READERS? WILL THIS RAINBOW DASH COMIC FIND ITS WAY IN YOUR MARCH SHOPPING CART? IS RYAN K. LINDSAY TOO GOOD FOR COMICS? SHOULD THE JUNIOR MEMBERS OF THE GENIUSBOY FIREMELON STAFF JUST TAKE OVER THIS SITE AND TURN IT INTO A SHOPPING MALL?

YOU DECIDE!

BEFORE THEY WERE FAMOUS: A When Words Collide Archive

One of the recurring features within my weekly CBR column in 2012 was something I called "Before They Were Famous" where I would write about the issue of a comic book series right before a more famous run began. I plan to do some more of these at some point in the distant future, but I wanted to have an easy-to-reference list of links to the entries I have already completed, so here it is!

BEFORE THEY WERE FAMOUS, via When Words Collide and CBR and me:

Swamp Thing #19, by Marty Pasko, right before Alan Moore came in and blew the roof off of American comics.

X-Men #66, the last of the pre-Chris Claremont era X-Men with what seems to be a pretty weak Roy Thomas inventory story.

Captain America #32, the Robert-Kirkman-written ridiculous conclusion to the post-9/11 take on the Sentinel of Liberty, prior to Ed Brubaker's relaunch.

Supreme #40, another pre-Alan Moore comic, where Jim Valentino and Tom and Mary Bierbaum tell something that resembles a story but isn't very good by anyone's reckoning.

Batman #403, by Max Allan Collins, immediately before Frank Miller and David Mazzucchelli presented us with the serialized "Batman: Year One."

Incredible Hulk #330, which was Todd McFarlane's first issue but the last of the Al-Milgrom-written issue before Peter David's monumental run began.

Iron Man #115, written by Bill Mantlo, with David Michelinie and Bob Layton waiting to strike in the following issue.

Doom Patrol #18, the final Paul Kupperberg issue before Grant Morrison began his dadaist superhero masterpiece.

If you have any suggestions for other "Before They Were Famous" installments, let me know!

The Great Alan Moore Reread: The Super-Index

After sixty-five weeks, my Great Alan Moore Reread at Tor.com has reached its conclusion. To celebrate, and make it easier to reference any of the individual posts, here is the super-index of every installment of the series. Yeah!

I wrote a lot. But Alan Moore wrote a lot more. That guy's pretty good. Here's what I thought about almost all of his comics.

I have an intro post with It Begins and then I explore the Moore catalog with my brain (click on any of the entries to go to the relevant post and enjoy):

1. Marvelman/Miracleman Part 1
2. Marvelman/Miracleman Part 2
3. Marvelman/Miracleman Part 3
4. Marvelman/Miracleman Part 4
5. Star Wars
6. V for Vendetta Part 1
7. V for Vendetta Part 2
8. Skizz
9. Doctor Who
10. Captain Britain Part 1
11. Captain Britain Part 2
12. Future Shocks
13. Swamp Thing Part 1
14. Swamp Thing Part 2
15. Swamp Thing Part 3
16. Swamp Thing Meets Superman
17. Superman
18. Watchmen Part 1
19. Watchmen Part 2
20. Watchmen Part 3
21. Watchmen Part 4
22. Green Arrow, Vigilante, Omega Men
23. Green Lantern Corps
24. Halo Jones
25. Batman
26. From Hell Part 1
27. From Hell Part 2
28. DR and Quinch
29. In Pictopia
30. Big Numbers
31. A Small Killing
32. Spawn
33. Violator
34. 1963
35. WildCATs
36. Spawn/WildCATs
37. Mr. Majestic, Voodoo, Deathblow
38. Supreme Part 1
39. Supreme Part 2
40. Supreme Part 3
41. Judgment Day
42. Youngblood and Glory
43. The Spirit
44. Tom Strong Part 1
45. Tom Strong Part 2
46. Tom Strong Part 3
47. Tom Strong's Terrific Tales
48. Promethea Part 1
49. Promethea Part 2
50. Promethea Part 3
51. Top 10 Part 1
52. Top 10 Part 2
53. Smax
54. Top 10: The Forty-Niners
55. Tomorrow Stories Part 1
56. Tomorrow Stories Part 2
57. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Part 1
58. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Part 2
59. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: Black Dossier
60. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: Century
61. Lost Girls
62. Albion
63. Neonomicon
64. The Alan Moore Legacy
65. The 10 Best Alan Moore Comics of All Time

Yup.

The Splash Page Podcast: 2013 Edition

My old Splash Page co-host, Chad Nevett, hates Captain America.

I know.

I know.

But it's not really his fault. It's his culture.

In this SPECIAL 2013 SPLASH PAGE podcast episode, Chad and I talk for nearly three hours about comic book stuff (along with other stuff, like housing prices and donations to old people). It may be the final episode of The Splash Page podcast ever. You should probably listen and learn.

If you didn't click on the link above, you can listen to it by clicking HERE!

THE CHEMICAL BOX Episode 20: Featuring Me

Joey and Alec invited me to join them on THE CHEMICAL BOX podcast episode #20, so I did. Actually, I may have invited myself, and they said "yes." That might have happened.

Anyway, you can go listen to opinions that I probably contradict in later columns and conversations, but at the time of the podcast I said what I meant and I meant what I said.

You probably want some annotations for the episode. So here you go!

CHEMICAL BOX EPISODE 20 ANNOTATIONS

1. Luckily for us, DC Comics has changed the historical record so that we know that Superman did NOT appear in 1938, because that would be silly. He obviously first appeared in 2011. That is a verifiable fact! DC says so.

2. Rob Liefeld left DC and people talked about it. That happened forever ago, but this podcast is timeless!

3. I say "Batman, Inc" is the "only DC comic I am an active reader of at this point" which is not only an awkward phrasing, but it's also untrue. I also read "Batman" and "Action Comics" and "Wonder Woman." But I still think "Batman, Inc." is the best monthly comic from DC, and therefore Joey's opinion is the correct one.

4. Hawkeye by Matt Fraction and David Aja is also good. On Twitter, Matt Fraction sometimes refers to the comic as "Hawkguy," which is funny, but not as funny as that time I showed a clip from Michael Mann's "Last of the Mohicans" to my American Lit class when I was teaching about American Romanticism and one of the students thought I kept calling Daniel Day Lewis's character "Hot Guy" and was a bit freaked out by my repeated emphasis on his hotness.

5. I do get paid to write about comics, but contrary to what I say in the podcast, I couldn't literally buy every comic that comes out, because a LOT of comics come out every week. Have you ever read Diamond Previews? That is like a thick magazine of bad choices. Plenty of them.

6. These sci-fi and fantasy books are so much more fun to read than 99.9% of all comics written this year: THIS ONE. AND THIS ONE. AND EVEN THIS ONE.

7. Joey alludes to The Basement Tapes at CBR, by Matt Fraction and Joe Casey. Totally worth reading, if you haven't already. It will probably change your life.

8. I became very ill a week after saying "I feel amazing" and taunting Joey and Alec and I totally deserved it.

9. Is Rick Remender the greatest Marvel writer or the greatest HUMAN BEING on the planet? I don't think we answer that question at all. I make some analogy about cool parties instead. Cool parties are the best! But another way to say it is, "after you're 30, parties always seem like something that you are unlikely to have fun attending." Unless you're that old guy who crashes the party at the Weir's house in "Freaks and Geeks." That guy has fun every day of his life, obviously.

10. I watched all of the episodes of "Freaks and Geeks" last weekend. I didn't mention it on the podcast because the podcast was recorded weeks before I watched all those episodes, and therefore it has no place in these annotations, but if DC can pull off their revisionist history then I can say "Freaks and Geeks" whenever I want.

11. My China Mieville Top 2: #1 "Perdido Steet Station." #2 "The Scar." I don't really like any of his other books all that much, but I REALLY like those two novels. You should read them someday so you can fully understand our sophisticated conversation about "Dial H." It's deep.

12. When someone writes the definitive unauthorized biography of Karen Berger, I will read it.

13. Marvel Augmented Reality is the worst thing to happen to comics. It is the chromium covers of the 2010s, but worse. The chromium covers mixed with motion comics mixed with cd-roms, all in one.

14. Joey's theory about the new DC logo may have been roundly refuted by all parties involved, but he is so enthusiastic about it that it must be true.

15. I think Phil Jimenez abandoned THIS weird and interesting comic he created to go and tackle that off-the-rails Donna Troy miniseries that was a complete mess. Whatever happened to "Otherworld"? Will it ever be completed, Phil Jimenez???

16. This is a really long podcast, I hope you love it as much as Alec Berry loves comic books!

Goodbye Joe, and Thank You

Keith Giffen talks OMAC

I talked to Keith Giffen the other day, doing research for another project I'm working on, but later in the conversation he started recounting his experiences on OMAC, a project he clearly enjoyed, and because OMAC has absolutely nothing to do with the article I'm writing, I figured I'd share what he had to say about the series here, since it's turned into process week at old Geniusboy Firemelon productions.

Giffen talked about how he never outlines or thumbnails what he's drawing, and on OMAC, he would take Dan DiDio's plot and then, he says...

I would go through the book, and, up front, I would do the panels that I don’t want staring at me when the deadline’s tight. I call them the ‘kitchen sink’ panels, the two-page spreads, whatever. Get that out of the way. So I work out of order now, but I still don’t outline. I’ll have page 14, and page 18, and page 20, and now it’s time to put them together. 

So, without knowing what he's actually going to draw on pages 1-13, 15-17, and 19, he drew the other pages based on where he thought the big images should go. Then he filled the rest in, almost improvisationally, following DiDio's plot, unless he decided to throw something else in for fun, like when Superman appeared, just because Giffen thought he should pop into the story.

It keeps it spontaneous with me, because I can surprise myself. And I like to think it translates to the work and keeps it spontaneous for the reader, and they’re never quite sure what’s going to happen next.

OMAC's long gone as a New 52 series from DC. But it was fun while it lasted, and Giffen's energetic improvisation was the major part of its charm.

Charles Forsman: On His Process and Paper Over Digital

I wrote my upcoming "When Words Collide" column as kind of a feature article about Charles Forsman and his new microcomics publishing venture. Well, I suppose it's about more than that. It's like Forsman's comic book life story, and everything that led up to him working in Hancock, writing and drawing books for Fantagraphics, while he pumps out Risograph-printed minicomics by a bunch of talented artists. Look for it on Monday at CBR.

But our conversation led in a couple of directions that didn't end up fitting into the column, so here are some outtakes that didn't make it into my piece. First, Charles talking about his process:

It usually does start with writing, usually in the sketchbook. It starts with paragraphs of what’s going to happen, maybe. Then I break that down into chapters, with further description, and then I use that one page in a sketch book, for TEOTFW, and I work very teeny tiny in there.

A lot of cartoonists draw and redraw and do several drafts, full size…and I’ve been more laborious with my work in the past…but with this I’m more worried about just telling the story and not drawing fancy.

Even the original art is small to keep things quick.

I’ll do thumbnails so tiny no one else can read them, and I’ll put the dialogue outside. Jason Lutes shared his process when he was at CCS. He has two little boxes for a page, on one sheet of paper, and he’ll write the dialogue outside. So that’s how I’ve been working recently.

It always changes from project to project. Sometimes I’m loose, and sometimes I need more structure, but that sort of idea is what I stick to. Quick thumbnails. Because I feel it keeps the spontaneity. I don’t like to labor over it too much, because I feel it makes things too stiff.

And here's Charles responding to me when I said something like: "Most people today, if they wanted to do draw something quick and spontaneous for fun, and get it out to readers, would just do a webcomic. But you seem to reject that idea and spend all this time making small physical copies of your comics. Why not just do it all digitally?"

I personally can’t read stuff on the screen, at my computer.

The way I tell stories, I need that page. I have so much trouble just determining a trim size I’m going to use. With a computer there’s so many options. I could do full color…it just feels too unlimited. I respond to limitations a lot better. It’s almost like a challenge to tell what I want to tell and do what I want to do in eight pages.

The thing that I discovered…serialization is just -- the type of comics I do, everyone’s worried about the graphic novel, with one big story….small publishers aren’t printing them any more. Nobody’s buying them. It wasn’t something I even experimented with, until I accidentally did it with this series. All of a sudden, I was having cliffhangers, and it was really fun. And people were coming back month in and month out. I know serialization still goes on with the superhero comics, but it was something I felt like I had to rediscover for myself. It seemed like something that was gone from my comics scene. And I love it. It makes me sad that it’s not around anymore.

There’s that romantic idea of comics being a throwaway artform, that I still kind of like. I like that it’s just a dollar and that it’s on copy paper and it’s not something to really cherish. I really respond to that, that you can tell a great story without high production values.

I really like what Charles and his friends are up to, and Oily Comics is definitely worth checking out.

Heroes Con 2012! I Will Be There, Will You?

Hey! I will be at Heroes Con from Friday through Sunday this week, moderating a couple of panels over the weekend (With the Immonens! With Don Rosa! With Geof Darrow!) and selling copies of "Grant Morrison: The Early Years," "Teenagers from the Future," "Minutes to Midnight," and maybe more!

I will be set up at table AA-215. Stop by and pick up a book. Or just stop by to say hi!

See you there!

Playtesting DnDNext Part 6: Mini-Taur

Partially disoriented by the magical befuddlement of the Minotaur Maze in the Caves of Chaos, Bob the Dwarf, Lily the Halfling, Cary Cycax, and new girl Lucy battled a dozen pesky stirges, which didn't do much damage but took about ten rounds to wipe out and didn't gain them a single coin of treasure, which they didn't much enjoy.

Aimlessly wandering left, then right, then left, they chanced upon the cavern that led straight to the Minotaur's hangout. Making plenty of noise as they approached (they all rolled below 10 on Dexterity or Stealth rolls), the Minotaur came charging.

For this big battle -- likely the final combat before Television's Ryan Callahan and the heart-and-soul of Cary Cycax had to head back to New York City as the weekend drew to a close -- I decided to spring the Dwarven Forge pieces out of semi-retirement. It was a chance to test D&D Next with a tactical battlefield. The theater of the mind gave way to miniatures and 5'x5' squares. Line of sight could be clearly determined. It was new D&D, 4e style.

And it felt like it.

I like playing 4th Edition, and I've seen players of all ages pull some fun tactical combos during combat. But D&D Next, until this Dwarven-Forge-enabled session with the Minotaur, felt more wide open. Anything was possible.

The Minotaur battle, with the D&D Next rules, but the detailed 3D battlefield and miniatures felt clinical compared to the fun we'd been having with the new rules until then. Here's what happens: once you turn the game from a conversational, improvisational, imaginative game with some dice rolls to a game that has a board and tiny little figures and a specific dimensionality, the creativity turns from artistic imaginings and "yes, and..." to precise tactical moves and linear decision-making.

Let me put it this way, when you play Monopoly, you don't imagine that you are actually a giant top hat marching through Atlantic City, wheeling and dealing with renters. Once D&D takes a miniature-based focus, it becomes a game where the attention is on what's in front of the players on the game board, rather than what the players themselves are doing and saying.

And 4th Edition cannot accurately be played without miniatures and battle maps. D&D Next can. And should.

It was a good idea to test D&D Next, in this Minotaur encounter, with minis, to see what happened. But the battle was dry, almost colorless, compared to the previous battles. So now we know. Leave the Dwarven Forge in the basement. Use it to re-enact Dolph Lundgren Punisher scenes with Heroclix.

The Minotaur battle also taught us another thing about the mechanics of D&D Next. The "Disadvantage" disadvantage is devastating. The Minotaur was blinded in the first round, and though he lashed out at Bob the Dwarf and hit him a few times, he stumbled over rubble and missed far more often than he hit. And Lily and Cary Cycax blasted away from a distance, doing over 100 damage to the Minotaur in just over a handful of quick rounds.

It's worth noting that D&D Next, already accused of giving less options to characters, didn't become roll-hit/miss/damage/or-not/go until we played with the miniatures. It was the context of the game, not the rules themselves, that changed it to become more vanilla.

Luckily, the flavor returned to the game when the Minotaur was killed, Cary Cycax cut off his head as a trophy and the hidden treature horde was found. Secure in the hidden treasure room, the adventurers camped out and took their first long rest since entering either the Gallery of Death or the Minotaur Maze. And with some time on his hands, and the smithing/armoring skills of Lily the Halfling, Cary Cycax decided to customize his scale mail, by weaving the Owlbear hide into his protective gear.

By the next morning, the adventurers were ready for more, and Cary Cycax, Cleric of Pelor, had a new, intimidating look to match the brave face he wore as he prepared for further adventures in the Caves of Chaos:

THE END (FOR NOW)

Playtesting DnDNext Part 5: Owlbear Rug

The Owlbear, as it turned out, wasn't particularly difficult to kill at all. A few well-placed blasts of holy light, some hacks from the greataxe and smashes of the warhammer, and a sneaky backstab and the Owlbear was slain before he could knock any of the good guys unconscious.

Because of the low hit point totals for the adventurers, after their Ooze troubles, I did lower the Owlbear's hit points (figuring that it would make for a more even matchup, and it made in-story sense since the creature would have just finished fighting and possibly devouring Lucy's friends just moments before).

But I didn't need to lower the hit point total. They would have easily defeated the Owlbear anyway.

They decided to take a short rest in the Owlbear's lair, and Lily noticed that her character sheet gave her a trade that she hadn't yet talked about. She decided she had a blacksmith background, and between the metal of Lucy's fallen comrades and the equipment they all had in their packs, she could repair the armor and weapons damaged by the Ooze.

Meanwhile, Cary Cycax skinned the Owlbear, taking its pelt as a trophy.

After their rest, they checked out the final section of the Gallery of Death, and decided not to mess with the remaining Ooze. They'd had enough. Bob, Lily, Cary Cycax, and their new Cleric pal Lucy (who, if not a muppet played by an 8-year-old girl, would likely have been drawn into fierce theological arguments by Cary Cycax) crept back out into the thicket outside the caves and decided to climb higher, looking for another cave entrance.

What they found was mythical. Literally. From that Perseus story. It's pretty famous.

Google maps would have placed them at 1 Minotaur Main Street, Caves of Chaos, Gygaxianville.

TO BE CONTINUED

Playtesting DnDNext Part 4: The Ooze

Instead of returning to the Kobold-kluttered entrance to the Caves of Chaos, Bob the Dwarf, Lily that Halfling, and the legendary Cary Cycax headed deeper into the ravine straight into the Gallery of Death, where they faced one wandering monster after another, starting with the vicious Gray Ooze.

The acidic watery tendrils of the Ooze bludgeoned Bob the Dwarf, eating into the shiny new shield and the fear of metallic decay on the heavily armed-and-armored warrior led him to flee the scene and gather his thoughts alone in the thicket outside as his allies tried to tackle the Ooze, without much luck.

Cary Cycax blasted the Ooze with holy light and Lily flung rocks from her sling, but the tide didn't turn in favor the intrepid heroes until Bob remembered that he had a piece of equipment to be named later, "from a previous campaign," according to his character sheet. He declared that it was an Obsidian Sword, a normal melee weapon in all respects, but invulnerable to the Ooze's metal-destroying touch.

Awesome. He hacked it to bits.

A handful of roaming rats nibbled at their ankles as they marched onward, deeper into the Gallery of Death, their footsteps crunching over the bones of other, less able, adventurers. (Probably from the original edition, when a Magic-User would get stuck with 2 hit points and cloth armor for extra deathening.)

The noise of footsteps, clanking armor rushing toward them, echoed through the caverns.

It was Lucy, Cleric of Moradin. Played by...my daughter's muppet.

My daughter declared, at the beginning of the day's game, before entering the Gallery of Death, that her muppet wanted to play too. So...a chance to test out the Cleric of Moradin, with the muppet rolling her dice and a tiny voice from behind the chair making decisions for the character. (Don't let my daughter know, but I could totally see her moving the muppet's arms and mouth. Shh.)

Lucy the Cleric of Moradin had lost her party in the caverns. They had been killed by the Owlbear who took the bodies back to its lair.

Bob, Lily, and Cary Cycax joined Lucy in her quest for vengeance, with Owlbear hate in their hearts, and lingering injuries from the Ooze battle. But they were not to be deterred. There was an Owlbear to kill, and how difficult could that be?

TO BE CONTINUED

Playtesting DnDNext Part 3: The Legend of Cary Cycax

Part Three of my family's continuing adventures in playtesting DnDNext. Read Part One and Part Two if you haven't. Both good.

Day One of playtesting, about 45 minutes total, brought Bob and Lily into wily combat with wandering Bugbears and guardians of a nasty Kobold nest. There was little role-playing, but plenty of improvisational battle moves.

Day Two of playtesting brought a different flavor, with the arrival of Television's Ryan Callahan, who joined our playtest group for the weekend, playing the righteous Cleric of Pelor, named Cary Cycax.

Television's Ryan Callahan played Cary Cycax as a declarative huckster of the sun god, proselytizing with nearly every sentence he uttered.

Bob and Lily joined forces with Cary Cycax to journey back into the CAVES OF CHAOS, but first they headed to the town of Mort, which they made up, because they said they could rest there and get some supplies.

On the way to Mort, only a few miles hike through the deforested landscape -- Mort was built using a primitive clear-cutting strategy -- they were attacked by a pair of Goblin brigands who were easily dispatched by the ray of light from Cary Cycax's staff and the vicious cleaver of Bob the Dwarf. Television's Ryan Callahan, unprompted, eloquently described the soul of a dead Goblin leaving his body, as his corpse withered under the eye of Pelor. Playing off this kind of make-up-the-details-as-you-go roleplaying, my son described the gushing blood from his Goblin victim washing over his Dwarven body, healing all his wounds with magical power.

I vetoed that one.

For everyone on the D&D forums whining about how DnDNext relies too much on DM fiat, I will say as I have always said, "any decent DM will say yes to anything, unless it is completely out of the realm of even fake-medieval-super-magical reality." So no magical healing blood spewing from Goblin bodies all of a sudden.

When they arrived at Mort, I had each player name one famous town landmark. My daughter said, "The Great Window," my son said, "The Casino," and Television's Ryan Callahan said, "The Bottomless Trough." "Is that the name of an all-you-can eat restaurant?" "No, it's just a trough, that's bottomless."

The Great Window turned out to be a platform looking out in the distance toward a simmering volcano. The Bottomless Trough turned out to be less interesting than it sounds, and it didn't even sound interesting. And the Casino -- renamed The Gaming House of Mort -- led to a rousing game of Three Dragon Ante, where Lily the Halfling used her "Luck" to win a handful of gold pieces and a Dwarven heavy shield for Bob's use -- assuming he could find a one-handed weapon to use instead of relying on his greataxe. Didn't those dead Goblins have maces? They did. Bob could run back outside of town and pick his choice of bloody Goblin mace for no money down and no easy payments of 0 gps per day.

The party slept at The Inn. Tomorrow, THE RETURN TO THE CAVES OF CHAOS, healed-up and now with a heavy shield. Of justice.

Speaking of justice, friend, have you let the divine light of Pelor into your heart?

TO BE CONTINUED

Playtesting DnDNext Part 2: Kobold and Run

Part Two of my family's continuing adventures in playtesting DnDNext. Read Part One if you haven't. It's good.

After defeating the Bugbears, and getting mightily bruised in the process with no healing in sight (without a Cleric around, healing doesn't much happen in DnDNext until an overnight sleepover), Bob the Fightin' Dwarf and Lily the Rogueish Halfling entered the CAVES OF CHAOS [Booming voice].

Tentatively.

Though accustomed to balanced encounters and passive perception from 4th Edition, my son, playing Bob, was wise enough to slowly lead the procession into the nearest cave entrance, where he uncovered a dangerous pit trap before falling into it himself.

That pit trap would become the centerpiece of their entire anti-Kobold strategy soon enough, for within a round, six Kobold guards chanced upon our already-battered heroes.

Spear-flinging and responsive strategy ensued.

My daughter, playing Lily, leaped backwards over the pit and enticed the Kobolds to try to come toward her, picking them off with her sling when they tried to maneuver around the fragile edges of the ten-foot drop. Bob swung his greataxe with gusto, slamming nearby Kobolds into cavern walls and -- in a desperate move with only a few hit points remaining -- swung his axe into the spine of one last Kobold, catapulting its corpse on top of its fallen brethren in the pit below.

Two of the Kobolds had already fled deeper into the caves, presumably to get help, but our tiny wounded party didn't pursue. They staggered out of the mouth of the cave, into the sunlight, seeking help. They couldn't delve further without healing, or without assistance from the gods.

Luckily, Cary Cycax, Cleric of Pelor, was only a few hundred feet away.

TO BE CONTINUED

Playtesting DnDNext Part 1: Bugbears Eat Meat

As you may (or may not) know, Wizards of the Coast released their public beta test of the new D&D rules yesterday. Currently called "DnDNext" or some variation of that, the rules are stripped-down and much more in tune with the simpler, earlier editions, pre-bloat, and they are a clear attempt by Wizards to engage players young and old by paring D&D back to its most essential components, while still making the system run smoothly.

The playtest rules are closer in spirit to the game I first started playing -- with the Moldvay Basic rules, 30 years ago -- than the 4th Edition rules that have been the core game for the past three years.

My daughter, the artist in the family, just discovered my Basic D&D books last week, after asking about how long I've been playing. When I showed her all the dungeon maps I created when I was 10, she busted out the old graph paper and started making her own, full of traps and secret doors and dangerous passages.

She's part of my DnDNext playtest team, definitely, with her two years of experiences (even at only age 8) with 4th Edition, and her multiple-sessions-worth-of-experience with both Gamma World and Mutants & Masterminds. She prefers Dexterity-heavy sneak-attack characters in every kind of game she plays.

The other member of my DnDNext playtest team is my son, now age 11, who has also been playing 4th Edition D&D for two years, along with Gamma World and Mutants & Masterminds. He likes to play weapons-master characters, ones that can smash stuff with axes and swords and maybe do some cool cinematic moves at the same time. He's an astute critic of these games already, and he can tell you why he likes Gamma World better than 4th Edition (more creative potential, more absurdity) and he comes to any tabletop game with hundreds of hours of video game experiences and a preference for pixels over papers and pencils.

So we busted out the DnDNext playtest packet, on my iPad, with just a character sheet printed out for each of the two players. My son chose the Dwarf Fighter and my daughter chose the Halfling Rogue. No surprises there.

I went mini-less and battle-map-less, because if there's one thing that would emphasize that DnDNext is NOT a tweaked version of 4th Edition, it's the lack of map-centric powers and abilities. Sure, we could have used a map to show positions in combat, but it wasn't necessary -- a few quick lines on a piece of paper showed where everything was in relation to one another -- and the battle in the "theater of the mind" was just as much fun for the kids than anything they'd ever played in 4th Edition or Gamma World or Mutants & Masterminds.

But I'll get to that later.

Before we started on our way, with Bob the Dwarf and Lily the Halfling on their way to explore the Caves of Chaos, my son expressed hesitation about his underpowered character. 15 AC for a fighter??? No special moves??? He declared DnDNext a terrible game, even before we started marching the characters toward their cavernous doom.

My daughter didn't care either way, she just wanted to make sure her character was named after one of her friends at school.

On the way to the Caves, they chanced upon a couple of Bugbears gnawing on an animal carcass. Bob the Dwarf charged in, greataxe blazing. Lily the Halfling tried to climb a tree and leap down on them from above. She failed her first attempt, but chose to use another action to try again, figuring that leaping from above, even delayed a turn, was better than charging in with her tiny dagger.

They dispatched the Bugbears swiftly, with Bob improvising a move to smash one of the monsters into the other, knocking down his foul compatriot, and Lily dropping down to stab the fallen Bugbear in the eye. Vicious little kids, desensitized to violence, what has this country come to, etc, etc, it was awesome.

My son's negativity lingered, but once he got to the Caves of Chaos, everything would change and his grumpy playtesting approach turned to, "hey, this was a lot more fun than I expected."

Find out why next time.

TO BE CONTINUED!

Wednesdays: Come Out and Play

On Wednesdays, beginning on May 16th and running for the next three months, I will be running D&D Encounters at Fantasy Realms in Pittsfield, MA from 4:30-6:30 each week.

The May 16th session is for character creation, and each following week will feature a mini-installment (or encounter) of the "Web of the Spider Queen" adventure written by Logan Bonner.

The whole purpose of the D&D Encounters program is to bring in new players, and to have some regular fun for people who can come in for a week, but might miss other weeks, and everyone can still have a good time. If you don't create a character -- or bring a suitable character to play (email me for details) -- then you'll play one of the cool pre-gen characters provided by Wizards of the Coast.

Why am I running D&D Encounters locally? Well, I want to play it, and no one else is running it, so I might as well just take charge of the thing. And I've been running D&D games at home with friends and family for the past two years and a little bit after school this year, so I figured making it a formal weekly thing would be a good idea.

All my friends and family members and anyone else can swing by on Wednesday afternoons and play.

It's limited to 5 players per week, so contact me or Fantasy Realms to sign up for certain Wednesdays, and I will see you there!